Whether you think you can or you can’t you’re right
Henry Ford’s famous quote may seem a tad cold when talking about recovery. But I know from first hand experience he is right.
In my own struggles with alcoholism, I was forever saying I would quit but never made a firm resolution (a pact with my soul) to do whatever it takes no matter what.
There was always a small voice in the deepest crevices of my psyche that would allow me a way out if times got too difficult.
And that same voice would also say, you will never be able to quit because you’re a weak pathetic loser.
My identity was that of a man struggling to quit alcohol, not a man who simply doesn’t drink.
I am now a good few days sober and after my last drink the dialogue in my mind was totally different to all those other times I’d promised myself (and others) that I would quit drink for good.
It went something along the lines of:
- I am sober and I never have to drink again as long as I…
- make permanent sobriety the most important thing in my life…
- and I get all the help I can
About 2 weeks after my last drink I was in rehab.
What is Identity Shifting?
I’d never heard about identity shifting back then, but essentially that is what made all the difference after my last drink.
Identity shifting is a process that helps you to redefine yourself at your core. It involves challenging and reshaping your inner narrative in order to move away from a limiting or negative self image towards a more empowering identity.
The concept of identity shifting is based around the belief that how we identify ourselves isn’t fixed and changes over the course of a lifetime. It taps into the brain’s neuroplasticity – when we consistently act in ways that reflect a new identity, our brains begin to form new pathways that reinforce that self-image.
In essence, acting as if we are already the person we are striving to be, changes the very core of who we are over time.
The Role of Identity in Addiction
Addiction can deeply impact a person’s sense of self. Over time, the struggle with addiction can create a fixed identity—an internalised belief about who you are that becomes intertwined with the substance or behavior you rely on.
Addiction thrives on repetitive behaviors that create patterns in the brain and reinforce a narrative about oneself. For instance, the cycle of craving, using, and coping with guilt or shame can lead to thoughts like:
- “I can’t control myself.”
- “This is just who I am.”
- “I’m too far gone to change.”
These beliefs solidify an identity centred around addiction, making it difficult to imagine a life beyond it. The more someone associates their sense of self with their addiction, the more challenging it becomes to break free—because quitting isn’t just about stopping a behavior; it’s about redefining who they are.
As recovering addicts and alcoholics, we are so much more than our war stories and poison of choice. Personally I believe that we can do anything we put our minds to as long as we don’t imbibe, snort, inject etc
Someone who continues to view themselves solely as “an addict” or an “alcoholic” limits themselves to an outdated self-definition and is unable to fully embrace a healthier future.
On the other hand, adopting a new identity—such as “someone in recovery,” “a survivor,” or “a resilient individual”—opens the door to growth and change.
How can identity shifting help with recovery
By consciously embracing a new identity, people in recovery can break free from the limiting beliefs and behaviors tied to their addiction and look forward towards a future where they identify as capable and resilient individuals worthy of growth.
Here are some ways in which identity shifting can help with recovery:
Break free of limiting beliefs
When I was struggling with alcoholism, each relapse eroded my confidence, self-worth and compassion for myself. I viewed myself as a pathetic loser and couldn’t see how I could ever achieve permanent sobriety. I needed to shift my identity to one of someone that was sober and in recovery. This shift impacted my daily actions to someone that would go to meetings rather than the pub.
Providing a clear path forward
Consciously identifying as somebody that doesn’t drink or use drugs provides a framework for change by helping align with the person you want to be. For instance, someone who sees themselves as a “health-conscious individual” is more likely to adopt habits like exercising, eating well and avoiding harmful substances.
Encouraging self compassion and growth
People struggling with addiction often experience shame and self-judgment. By shifting identity, individuals can move away from the negative emotions tied to their addiction and focus on self-compassion.
For example, identifying as someone who is continually learning about their addiction and themselves after a relapse is a more healthy way to view setbacks than seeing oneself as a loser.
Creating resilience against relapse
A person who strongly identifies with their new self-concept is less likely to engage in behaviors that conflict with it. An alcoholic seeing themselves as a ‘sober role model’ for instance, may find it easier to resist temptations because they don’t want to betray their new identity. This internal alignment builds resilience, making it easier to stay on track even when faced with challenges.
Practical steps for shifting identity in recovery
Here are practical strategies to begin shifting your identity and supporting your recovery journey:
Visualisation
Imagine the person you wish to become. How do they look? What are their daily habits? How do they act and most importantly, how do they feel?
Try spending a few minutes each day visualising your future self living a life of sobriety and health.
Change your self-talk
Shifting from negative, limiting language to positive, empowering self-talk is essential. Replace thoughts like “I’ll always be an addict” with affirmations like “I am a strong, resilient person in recovery.”
Create a list of affirmations that align with your new identity. Repeat them aloud each morning or write them in a journal to reinforce this mindset.
Change your habits
Your daily habits are the foundation of your identity. Adopt the behaviours of the person you wish to become.
Choose a small habit that reflects your desired identity and practice it daily. Even simple actions, like drinking water instead of alcohol or journaling your thoughts, can reinforce your transformation.
The power of I am statements
The language you use about yourself directly shapes your identity. Statements that begin with “I am” are especially powerful because they declare your sense of self. Incorporate these statements into your daily routine to align your identity with your recovery goals.
Consider writing down three “I am” statements that reflect your desired identity (e.g., “I am resilient,” “I am sober and thriving,” “I am a source of positivity for others”).
Closing thoughts
Shifting your identity in recovery isn’t about making a sudden leap; it’s about taking consistent, intentional steps toward the person you want to become. With time, these small changes compound, transforming not just your behavior but the way you see yourself. By embracing these practical steps, you can build a new identity rooted in health, resilience, and self-empowerment—paving the way for lasting recovery.
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